RTS presents Arkoski’s “Vlad - The Lazy Vampire”

Vlad drank his cocktail - courtesy of the Vampi, Eleanora. “Why can’t being a vampire be like True Blood?

“Seriously?” Eleanora snorted.

“Sure, why not?” Vlad replied.

Eleanora laughed. “Fairies, shape shifters and werewolves all living in the same little town in podunk Louisiana?

“They have their issues.” Vlad retorted.

“Just finish your cocktail. I really don’t want to have this conversation with you.”

“Cause you know I am right.”

Eleanora smirked.

“I’d be a bad-ass.” Vlad proclaimed.

“You would be the town lazy-ass and if you ever was able to take yourself outdoors, you’d end up dead.”

Vlad leaned in with furrowed brow. “How so?”

“Because, no one in town would carry your lazy ass indoors before the sun came up.”

“Aha!” Vlad replied, falling back to his relaxed position. "With fairy blood they wouldn't have to."

Vlad in season 6?

… to be continued.

RTS presents Arkoski’s “Vlad - The Lazy Vampire”

“You look like shit. When was the last time you fed?” Eleanora the colonies' Vampi, asked.

Slouching forward, arms lazily hanging at his sides. Vlad looked more like a zombie than a vampire. “Well, I was about to but the bitch walked away.”

Eleanora's brow furrowed in confusion, she asked. “The bitch walked away?”

“Ya, she said I was cute and then just walked away.” Vlad replied, looking up at her will shallow cheeks and sunken eyes.

“And you didn’t stop her, Vlad?”

“Seriously, Eleanora?” Vlad exclaimed, as he fell on the dusty floor of the retreat.

Eleanora rolled her eyes and sighed in disgust. “You really are a lazy bastard.”

… to be continued.

RTS presents Arkoski’s “Vlad - The Lazy Vampire”

Vlad: “I want to suck your blood.” Rising on his toes, he spreads his cape wide.

Not so willing victim:  “You’re cute.” She says, as she turns and walks away.

Vlad: “Hey, come back here. You don’t expect me to chase you?” He says, lowering back on the balls of his feet. He watches as his victim continues to walk away. He stretches for her in an exaggerated motion. Just out of his reach now, “Fuck, she might as will be a mile away,” he gripes.

Until next time – on The Lazy Vampire